When we think of shadow work, we often focus on the parts of ourselves we consider negative or undesirable—the emotions, traits, and behaviours we try to hide or suppress. But there’s a lesser-known aspect of shadow work that’s just as important: the golden shadow. It’s the side of us that we admire in others but fail to see in ourselves.
By understanding both our shadow and golden shadow, we can begin to integrate these hidden aspects into our lives, helping us live more fully and authentically.
What is a golden shadow?
The golden shadow refers to the qualities in others that we admire, envy, or even idolise. These might be traits like confidence, charisma, creativity, or kindness. The key is that these qualities feel out of reach, as if they belong to others but not to us. But the truth is, these very qualities are part of us too—our “golden” side, waiting to be recognised and embodied.
I used to admire a friend for her boldness and self-expression. I saw her as someone who effortlessly took up space and voiced her desires without hesitation. For a long time, I believed I couldn’t be like that. But what I didn’t realise at the time was that this quality I placed on a pedestal was part of my own golden shadow. It was something I admired because it was an aspect of myself I hadn’t yet owned. Once I began integrating this quality into my life, I found myself stepping into my own confidence and self-expression.
Why is shadow work important?
Shadow work isn’t just about confronting our darker traits; it’s about integrating all the parts of ourselves that we’ve disowned or ignored. Whether we see them as negative or positive, these qualities hold the key to our personal growth.
By recognising both our shadow and golden shadow, we begin to understand our full potential. Our admiration of someone else’s creativity or boldness, for example, may indicate that we have that same capacity within ourselves but haven’t yet developed it.
This work helps us build more authentic relationships, as we stop projecting our disowned parts onto others and start recognising our own strengths. When we understand our golden shadow, we stop idolising others for the traits we wish we had and begin embodying those qualities ourselves.
How can I start doing shadow work?
Shadow work starts with awareness. Begin by noticing the traits in others that trigger strong reactions—whether those reactions are negative (dislike or judgement) or positive (admiration or infatuation). These intense feelings are clues, pointing toward aspects of your shadow or golden shadow that are ready to be acknowledged.
Once you’ve identified these traits, ask yourself whether they represent something you’ve disowned in yourself. Do you find yourself drawn to certain qualities in others because you wish you could embody them? Are you irritated by specific behaviours in others because they remind you of your own hidden insecurities?
Bringing these hidden aspects into the light of awareness is the first step toward integrating them into your life. Over time, as you reclaim both your shadow and golden shadow, you’ll find that your relationships deepen, and your sense of self expands.
Reclaiming your golden shadow
Your golden shadow holds untapped potential, waiting to be embraced. By recognising the qualities you admire in others as part of yourself, you unlock new avenues for growth and self-expression. The next time you find yourself mesmerised by someone’s creativity, charm, or confidence, consider this: those very traits are part of your own golden shadow, waiting to be embodied.
The richness of shadow work lies in how it transforms not only your relationship with others but also with yourself. As you begin this journey of reclaiming your golden shadow, you might just discover the hidden gifts within you that are ready to shine.
