When you’re in conflict with someone, do you ever get a sneaky suspicion that the subject you are arguing about isn’t the *real* problem? If you do, that might mean that you are upset about a pseudo issue. ...
posts by
Shelley J Whitehead
How to know if you are ready to date again
A question I get asked a lot in relationship coaching is ‘how will I know when I am ready to date again?’ or ‘How soon is too soon to start dating again, after a breakup’. I’m a strong advocate of a conscious...
How to respond rather than react
Do you ever find yourself saying things you regret? Or reacting to a situation or a person in a way that, deep down, you know is going to make the situation worse? It’s easily done, particularly in situations that are...
Why do values matter in relationships?
If you want to improve your relationship skills, strengthen how you connect with others or are looking for a partner, it’s a really good idea to have a solid understanding of your own values as well as understanding...
What are values?
What, exactly, are values? It’s a term that gets talked about a lot in coaching, self-help, self-development and psychology… but there are actually lots of different definitions and interpretations of the...
The difference between reacting and responding
A reaction is an unconscious action. It’s an immediate kind of reflex, where we don’t do any processing of how we actually want to engage with the situation and what the healthiest or most productive next step could...
What is interdependence?
Have you heard the term interdependence? It’s an important concept to understand, as a foundation for healthy relationships. In my work as a specialist relationship coach, it’s something we talk about a...
How to manage performance anxiety
Performance anxiety is surprisingly common. Most often, you’ll hear it mentioned in the context of work (where it can also be called ‘stage fright’)… but is equally common in intimate settings. Today I’m going to focus...
A technique to help you get over your ex
Are you stuck in a heart break rut and finding it really hard to stop turning thoughts about your ex over and over in your head? Are you replaying moments in the relationship, trying to understand what happened and...
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